New Year, Good bye 2016

Once again it is New Year’s Eve!
I hope you all have a very Happy New Year and I wish you all the best!

Last year I summarised the year that had passed in a blog post, and I thought I’d do the same thing this year. But before that let me just mention my outfit of tonight!

I am wearing this skirt that is ridiculously beautiful and I feel fantastic in, from Tatyana. I saw this skirt on Instagram and knew I had to have it. It reminded me of something... I couldn't quite place my finger on what, but I was serious about owning it.

I was lucky enough to get it on sale, and I was even luckier to have it arrive in time for NYE. As I was getting ready I put on this V-neck top and bam! It hit me! It reminds me of the beautiful outfit that Grace Kelly wore in Rear Window (which happens to be one of my favourite Hitchcock's). Google it! It's uncanny!

I decided to keep the rest of the look completely 50's, so I wore my perfect Besame Red lipstick from Besame Cosmetics and finished it off with a loose powder (Vanilla Brightening Powder, also Besame). You'd think I was sponsored by Besame Cosmetics but unfortunately I'm not. Their products just feel very authentically vintage.

To top it all off I actually googled retro hairstyles for natural hair and got a brilliant hit. I found this blog post on the blog Bobby Pin, and I adore the hairstyle. It is really hard finding vintage and retro hairstyles for naturally curly hair. Most hair tutorials start with much looser curls than I have. So if you have any ideas for retro hairstyles for natural hair please leave me a comment!

On to the 2016 round-up...

While 2015 was one of the hardest years of my life, 2016 has been one of the best years! I have not recovered from my illnesses, and probably never will as they are all chronic, but I have gotten to a point where I manage my mental illness in a way that enables me to live my life.

I’ll be honest - I’ve had crap times in 2016 (as those of you who have followed me might remember). Days where it’s been impossible to get out of bed. Weeks where my anxiety has been so high and my OCD has made it so hard to get out of my apartment. I’ve even had months during this last year where I’ve felt so very low and uninspired in life. But it has all been isolated times surrounded by, in large, better times.

Top: Topshop (old)

Skirt: Tatyana (here)

Heels: B.A.I.T. Footwear (here)

Pearls: Borrowed from Mum

I started this year feeling better than I had for a decade. Last year ended with me being on a high. I was on good medication and I was continually working with a psychologist fighting against my OCD, anxiety and depression. In 2016 I have been entirely free from suicidal thoughts, and that, my friends is a major step in the right direction. I am back to work, full time! Which makes me so happy I could cry. I have bad weeks, and days, but all in all I am back to my previous self. I recognise the person that I am.

I still have OCD. I still have my obsessions and perform my compulsions, but as I mentioned - it is manageable now. I can lead a life at the side of being sick. It’s not all about my illness anymore. All of this, getting back to being happier and healthier has made me realise how important health is. And I’ve decided I want to end this year with a message of hope.

If you are doing unwell, whether physically or mentally, believe me it can get better! It’s not impossible! Get as much help as you can, and be as open as you can be - a healthier life is possible. I went into 2016 feeling hope and joy, and it has treated me well. I will continue to fight in 2017 for a happier, healthier life. And I wish all of you find your joy and happiness the same way I have.

Thank you so much to everyone that I’ve interacted with! You are all incredible! It still means everything to me that you are here and are willing to listen to my story. I also want to say that I am here and willing to listen to your story too! If anyone suffering from any mental illness feels the need to talk, I’m here! Talk to me! Because talking about it really eases something.

Here’s to 2017! May it be all you hope for and more!
And for the last time this year - Much love to all of you,

Think Pink

"On Wednesdays we wear pink!" 

Also "Banish the black, burn the blue and bury the beige. From now on girls, think pink!"

It is Wednesday, and I am thinking pink.

This is my second vintage dress. It's from the 1950's and it reminds me so of the soft pinky peach dress that Chuck wears in an episode of Pushing Daisies (see below).

This lovely pink dress is my first entirely pink dress since I'm an adult. Pink is a colour I wouldn't really have gone for a while back because I thought it was "girly". Well, I still think it's girly, but I don't necessarily think that girly is a bad thing. Why does everything that has to do with women and girls sound negative? Why can't girly mean just what it means! And why can't "being a woman" mean that you are someone that identifies as a woman, and nothing else?!

I didn't mean for the post to become this, but things like these bother me! Why did I for so many years think that liking a colour was bad? Shame on me!

It's the illusion that girly girls are lesser than their counterparts. But you can be any type of girl or woman and still be equal to other girls and women (and men for that matter). Anyway, it should be that way. Be who you want to be. It's once again the patriarchy that has managed to poison how we think of women. The notion that girls/women that think or act like men should be better or worth more is a big problem! All girls/women should be able to be what, who, how they want to be!

"I am a proud feminist! And I'm quite the girly girl, I like the colour pink, I love bows and polka dots. I love to wear cute stuff and peter pan collars! That doesn't make me any less of a feminist! Everyone can be a feminist!
Everyone should be a feminist!"

Back to the dress. I bought this vintage dress from one of my favourite vintage sellers on Etsy, Jumblelaya. And I got loads of compliments wearing it to work. Someone asked me if it's new, and I didn't know what to answer. I said it was 60 years old!
It certainly doesn't look that old.

Earrings: Azure Allure (gift)

Dress: Jumblelaya (vintage)

Petticoat: ModCloth (here)

Heels: BAIT footwear via Unique Vintage (here)

I'm sorry this post is such a mess, I just wrote what came to me in quite an inarticulate way.
Hope you are all doing well and and that you are being who you want to be without judgement from anyone!

Much love,

Waves

Hello all you wonderful people!
Hope you are doing well. I've had a rough week, with a lot of anxiety, and a low mood. Things haven't been as good as I've wanted them to be. Anxiety comes to me at certain times, it just hits me like a big freight train that comes out of nowhere. It is very hard to deal with it, and because of my comorbidity with OCD my anxiety makes my compulsions worse, which makes it feel like I take a step back in my recovery.

What is important to remember with any disease, especially mental health disorders, is that recovery is not linear. It does not go from bad to better and then good. It goes up and down and down and up, constantly changing like waves. With chronic illnesses like a lot of mental health disorders - complete recovery and being "cured" is not a possibility and accepting that takes time. I feel like I have come to terms with OCD, anxiety and depression being a constant part of my life, but I still get weighed down when I have a dip.

I don't really know where I wanted to go with this post, I just want to be honest on the blog, and I want it to be clear that I don't always feel okay. And it's okay not to feel okay. Be kind to yourself, especially when you are feeling bad.

I am personally feeling loads better, the intensity of my anxiety has decreased. I had a great Friday evening and I just wanted to thank all those people who wrote kind and caring words to me during this hard week.

I hope you will all have a fantastic weekend! I am going to rest myself so that I am ready for next week! What are your weekend plans?

Blouse: Chicwish (old)

Skirt: Vivien of Holloway (here)

Petticoat: ModCloth (here)

Heels: BAIT footwear via Unique Vintage (here)

About the outfit, real quickly. I wore my lovely red Vivien of Holloway circle skirt again (last time), but I paired it with an old batwinged blouse from Chicwish. Finally I added some Ione heels from BAIT that are both comfy and so pretty. The inspiration behind this outfit was again the character Ann from Roman Holiday played by the one and only Audrey Hepburn. This was inspired by her outfit pre-makeover.

Take care of yourselves and each other!

Much love,

A Sweet Treat

A sweat treat for Valentine's day?
Why not wear it!

I'm so in love with this cupcake jumper. The moment I saw it I knew it had to be an addition to my wardrobe. It's so very "me" (she says about yet another clothing item with cupcakes on it).

Valentine's day is approaching, and I don't really celebrate it in any other way than eating some yummy treat and wearing something cute (preferably red). I'm a bit ambivalent about Valentine's day. It really is capitalist bollocks, but at the same time I sort of like a day to celebrate love.

I get bothered by people who seem to think that Valentine's day is simply for romantic love. I think it is a day where we should celebrate all kinds of love, including platonic love and self-love! Valentine's day does not have to be about being in a relationship, and it annoys me that people are anti-Vday because they are single. You can be single and celebrate Valentine's day anyway!! A life without romantic love is not a life without love.

Yes, media especially Hollywood films, seem to equal love to romantic love. It's like the value of other types of love have diminished over the years. The only love worth having is that of romantic love. But as someone who has never been in a romantic relationship - my love is worth just as much as your love, even if it is platonic! Just saying...

Now that I've done my preaching I'll go back to the outfit. I'm particularly happy with this outfit, and it feels like it is the perfect one for a day filled with treats (Vday!!). I adore the little collar clips that I got from the etsy shop, Femme De Bloom. They are so cute and I feel like the enhance the cupcake on my jumper.

I also love the small heels of BAIT footwear's Ione model. And it is surprisingly comfortable, which made me very happy to find out, as I had only bought flats from BAIT previously. I've got one pair of Ione's and one pair of Ida's, and I think the Ione's are more comfortable. What do you think? I know BAIT footwear is super popular amongst my followers on IG, so I'd love to hear which of BAIT's models you find to be the most comfortable.

Collar clips: Femme De Bloom (here)

Blouse: H&M (old)

Jumper: Unique Vintage (here)

Dress worn as skirt: Closet via ModCloth (old)

Heels: BAIT footwear via Unique Vintage (here)