When you're feeling low...

Hello lovely people.
You truly are lovely, and I got so much support from so many of you here and on Instagram in the past weeks. As I mentioned in my last post, my depression and anxiety hit me hard these past weeks, and I felt very low and unmotivated. I am now feeling much better, I readily smile and I feel hopeful. However, I thought it could be a good idea to talk some more about depression, so this post will be a little bit about what depression is, and how I personally think you should deal with it as someone who suffers or who is close to those who suffer.

Now we all have ups and downs in life that will make us feel sad at times, and I'm not saying it isn't hard to be sad but depression is different in that it persists for two weeks or more, or is recurrent. For me personally I feel like depression isn't so much sadness as it is an "emptiness". Emptiness and despair takes hold of you and it doesn't seem to want to let go. This in turn makes you unmotivated, and makes it hard to enjoy life and function through daily tasks. Just getting through the day can be totally overwhelming. But - Good news, it can get better! No matter how hopeless you feel it can always get better!

Some symptoms of depression are:

  • Persistent sadness, emptiness or low mood
  • Feelings of hopelessness
  • Feelings of worthlessness and/or guilt
  • Irritability and/or anger
  • Lost interest or pleasure in daily activities or hobbies
  • Decreased energy, fatigue, tiredness
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Difficulty sleeping
  • Aches and pains that cannot be explained by other illnesses
  • Appetite and/or weight changes
  • Thoughts of death and/or suicide
These are not all the symptoms, but the most common ones. And one person may not experience all of these symptoms, a person with depression can have some or many of these symptoms.

If you do have any of these symptoms please contact your doctor or another health care provider. Most importantly if you have the last symptom - please seek help immediately. There is help out there and you can feel better, the pain can go away with therapy and medicine. Please trust me on this one.

Now on to things that is very important to know about depression. 
First of all, depression is a real illness. It is not a sign of weakness or a character flaw. It is in fact partly due to chemical imbalances in the brain, and biological under-activation/over-activation of areas of the brain. You most certainly cannot "snap out of" clinical depression. And most people who suffer from depression will need treatment to get better.

Depression affects people in different ways. And the treatments will also work differently for different people. The people suffering will need different kinds of support and help. So it is very important to ask the people experiencing depression what kind of help they want/need. Number one tip I have for you who want to help a person suffering from depression is to let them know that you are there for them. And it can be as easy as flat out saying "I am here for you if/when you need me". Let the depressed person know that you are willing to talk and listen. Remember to listen. It is sometimes more important than talking!

For me personally I very much like it when someone tells me they're thinking of me. I don't like people to tell me it will pass. I know it will, but when I am in that low place it doesn't feel like it will pass, and everything is dreary and dark. Someone telling me it will pass or to cheer up, makes me feel worse, because it makes me feel as if this illness is my fault, and then I feel more guilty than I already do. Instead let the people know that you understand that they are going through a hard time, but that you are there for them.

Another thing that I appreciate very much is people being with me. Spending time with me, even if we're not interacting directly. It could be that we're watching a film together. Or just sitting in the same room. Write to me, or talk to me about anything between heaven and earth. This sort of confirms to me that you really are there for me.

And for the people suffering themselves - try to fill up as much time as you can with the people you love. Do the things you normally would like to do (even if it at this time does not seem interesting or fun). Try to fill your life with people and things you love. Try to sleep and eat well (as best you can, it's a tricky one, I know). Sleep when you're tired (which can be all the day... so be it). And let it take its course. Be kind to yourself.

Accept that this is an illness just like any other and that you are sick. For me that fact did a lot in allowing myself to feel bad without the guilt. Reach out to someone! Whether it is a friend or family, or a health care provider. Talk to people. Let people know you are not feeling your best. And allow yourself to feel sad, empty, frustrated and more. Cry if you need to, usually it releases something tense within, so it can feel like a relief. Don't be ashamed of your feelings. Feel what you feel, and try to never lose hope (which in itself is close to impossible with depression, I know...).

I was much better equipped at dealing with my bout of depression this time than the last time I felt it. I was open about it, on Instagram and with my family, which made things easier for me. And because I had dealt with it before I knew that I could get better. I am now actually feeling loads better. I have days when I feel low, empty and tired, but all in all it is getting better. It is with a smile that I write this, and I want to show you how happy I look. And yes, I've cut a fringe :)

Today and everyday, take care of yourself and one another.
Much love,


  1. You beautiful soul. I am so glad you're feeling better than you were before, and thank you for writing. I really appreciate you being open about your depression and for wanting to help others. Even though there have been some mental health issues in my family (I think I told you about my brother's bipolar syndrome), I never really knew what to do to help--that I should spend more time with them or tell them I'm thinking of them. I'm glad I know that now!

    Also, on a lighter note, the more I see your fringe, the more I like it (and I already loved it when I first saw it)!

    1. Oh Devinne you perfect human! Thank you so very much!! <3 <3
      Thanks, I feel like for me it's easier being open with it, rather than not. I'm glad my post gave you some ideas as how to help. It is very individual though, so another person might say something else helps them. But generally I think it's best not to be alone too much when you're low.

      Thank you! And my fringe thanks you too :3
      Much love

  2. Sending you much love, darling Mona. So glad to hear that you are improving and that smiles are coming easily now. I am still thinking of you and I love you loads!



    1. Thank you so much Liana, I definitely feel the love you send me.
      Love you too <3
      Thank you for being my friend :*

  3. So much love to you my dear, it is hard to deal with these things and I know you are doing the best you can and that is all you can ask from yourself. All things will pass with time and care. Many people still think depression is something you can click off, if it were that easy, no one would click it on to be honest. I get the seasonal depression, so I know it is tough. Spring is arriving and I look forward to feeling much better. I know you can do it, just be patient with yourself and do as you can. You're doing brilliantly :)) Much love to you Xxx

    1. Thank you so very much for your support. It means a lot.
      Exactly! If it was a button to press then it would have been easily fixed. I'm so sorry you get seasonal depression. I'm very happy though that the seasons are changing and we're moving to lighter days. I hope you feel loads better!
      Thank you so much lovely Kizzy, you're very kind. <3
      Much love to you too.

  4. I am so happy to hear you are feeling better, Mona. I am also very glad that you are so open about your depression. While I have not personally suffered from depression, I do have some that are close to me who do..and they have a harder time articulating what they are feeling. So, this post is very helpful to bring into perspective what I can do to be more helpful for them. Thank you for writing it!

    My thoughts are with you, dear Mona! I hope you have a much better week.

    Much love!


    1. Thank you so much darling Lindsey. Thanks, it means a lot reading that you appreciate my openness. I'm sorry you have someone close to you who suffers, just being there is the best thing you can do. But I think you already to that :) I'm glad this post helped you.
      Thank you so very much, it means so much to me. I am having a better week so far. Hope you are having a good week too.
      Much love

  5. I'm glad you're better. It just breaks my heart to think of you being so sad. You are too lovely a person to have to suffer this way. Sending hugs!


    1. Thank you so much dear Patty. You're very sweet. We unfortunately get illnesses in life, and I'm sad that this is what I got, but I've got to accept it. Thank you for those kind and caring words.
      Sending hugs and love right back to you <3

  6. I love that you are so brave to write about this. The only way mental illness will be better understood if people share their experiences with it. I love what you said about listening being more important than talking too...so true, for both instances involving depression or just in any circumstance in life. I'm such a weird and sporadic social media checker, so sorry if I missed majority of this! I'll be thinking of you for sure! XOXO

    1. Thank you so much Lauren-Blair! That's what I think too, we need to talk about it more openly.
      It's true, in life in general having someone that is willing to listen to you is very important.
      Not at all, I'm very thankful that you read it at all <3
      Thank you, and I of you! Happy Easter lovely lady!
      Much love

  7. I finally got time to read this post. I wanted to really focus on it, because depression is something I'm not familiar with, since I don't suffer from it nor do my friends and family. I love that you made it very clear to understand, especially that it is an illness - too many people still think it is not as serious as it is unfortunately. It feels like you did a lot of reflection about yourself and that in a way you know yourself better - that must have helped you this time! It's important to surround youself with people, IRL and URL, that can be there when you have to confide in them. I'm glad it's getting better Mona! :)

    Sending you love!
    Julia xx

    1. Thank you so very much for reading it Julia darling! <3
      I'm glad you and family+friends are spared from depression, it really can be bad. It is very unfortunate that some people still seem to think it's not an illness.
      That is totally true. I do know myself better and it did help a lot.
      Thank you so much wonderful lady. Happy Easter!
      Much love

  8. Depression is so debilitating. I suffer from that and anxiety, though my anxiety tends to rear its ugly head more these days. I wish more people understood that we can't just "snap out of it," like you said. I also agree with the emptiness feeling. It's like falling into a pit of despair. I guess that, at this point, along with medication, I tend to embrace my lows - by recognizing when I'm feeling depressed, making my loved ones aware that I need some space/time, and treating myself to some self care. Finding ways to work with it, as with any disease, I think is really important. Keep on fighting the good fight, lady!

    1. It really is. I'm so very sorry you suffer from depression and anxiety. Anxiety is troubling me a lot lately as well. We have to remember that it is an illness, like any other.
      I wish more people understood that too. I think if we talk about it more, more people will understand.
      Exactly! That's exactly how it feels!
      That are super good tips, I will heed them. I try to ride out my lows too. I agree with you. You learn the more you go through it how to deal with it. Thank you so much! And you too! You're amazing!
      Much love